Just Be AWESOME!

My Fit Friend: Sandra Singer!

A feature I would like to do once a week or so is called "My Fit Friend". I have made lots of connections in my fitness journey, as well as received motivation from friends and family who have pursued their fitness goals.

What is a fit friend? It can be anyone who is trying to work towards your fitness goals and making healthy changes in your life. Some of my friends are athletes, competitors, trainers, but it is also people like me, who are trying to lose weight, run that race, reach a goal that once seemed impossible. Would you like to be my fit friend and share your story? Email me at vancoe@yahoo.com for more information- I would love to feature you!!

So, my first "Fit Friend" is Sandy Singer. I met Sandy on the stairmill at my old gym. I love the connections and friendships I have created just by working out. I have a whole "gym family" and I love it!! I was doing 30-45 minutes each morning before I went in to work. She jumped up on the stairs next to me and introduced herself and we've been friends since. She was asking me if I was working towards anything, and I was telling her about my goal of becoming a bodybuilding bikini competitor. (Still a dream of mine, all in due time). Sandy had been working out for almost 15 years and seriously could step on stage and be ready to go...so I encouraged her to meet with Debbie and the rest is history! Here is her story:

My name is Sandra Singer and I am a 46 yr old mother of 2 boys and a IFPA Bikini Pro. I live in Washington MO and work for Evans GroundsCare as an account manager and I am also a Personal Trainer for Integrity Training. My fitness journey started about 15 yrs ago when a friend of mine asked me to join a gym with her I thought to myself why not I need to lose a few pounds and get toned up, little did I know that it would be the start of great changes to come. Here we are 15 yrs later and I am in the best shape of my life and now I am sharing my passion of fitness with others through personal training.

My favorite workout is leg day or leg days! It is the toughest workout but the most rewarding.

I work out at Complete Fitness, Lake St Louis MO and Powerhouse Gym St Louis MO. I train with Debbie Portell with Integrity Training Group she is also my coach for competition.

My Fitness goal is to build my glutes and and hamstrings for competition in June and to place in the top 3 in masters bikini.

Fitness challenges I have had stress fractures in my feet from long distance running along with a runners knee.

Accomplishments: I have run a total of 7 half marathons, more 5Ks then I can count and a few 10ks and 7ks. I competed last year June 2013 in my first NANBF Natural Bikini competition and place 1st in Tall and 1st in Master earning my IFPA Pro card. I then place 4th in my first IFPA Pro show in Sept 2013.


Influential Person/Mentor: Debbie Portell with Integrity Training Systems has really helped me become the athlete I am today. She is one of the most knowlegable people I know in fitness and so proud to not only have her as my coach but as my boss and friend as well. She is the true meaning of Integrity she lives up to the word by her actions and passion for what she does. You only need to meet Debbie once to see how much joy she has for what she does she would do anything to help you achieve your goal if you are willing to give it your all.

Integrity to me is how you walk your walk in life and show people what you are about what you stand for.


"Be Fit be Happy"

Sandy

Before, After, Now What?

Ok, I have been stressing about this post for days and days and days... But here it is. 

I finally got brave enough to post the first two pics on Facebook about a month ago. I was really happy with the support I received - who likes putting their before pics up?  Not me. But for me, the scariest part is talking about the "Now" picture. The one on the far right. 

First, the pic on the left is from 2007. My then-husband and I were in San Antonio, Texas celebrating our 10th anniversary. I had pretty much let myself go, wasn't working out at all and eating whatever. It was seeing myself in this picture, and ones like it, to try and lose weight and be healthy. I was winging it, that's for sure. I weighed over 174 in this pic. I think I quit weighing myself for a long while. I was a bit in denial. 

The middle picture- I am really proud of this one. It had almost been a year that I was working with Roger and I had been trying to get down to competition weight. At this point I weighed somewhere around the low 130's. This was taken in June, 2013 and I was around a size 6 

The last picture. Ugh. This is the one I'd really like to skim over and just wait until I look like my middle picture again. However, that's me. January 2014. I currently weigh 160 and run about a size 10/12. Yep. You read that right. I gained weight. I have tried to ignore it, I tried to pretend it didn't happen, I have been in a tailspin for about 4 months or so.  I have cried about it, been depressed about it, gotten mad about it, but realized I need to get back to basics and get to work. 

So what happened?? (I know, I ask myself that sometimes too. ). Did I quit going to the gym?  Nope. I continued to workout and lift weights. I wasn't hitting the cardio as rigorous as I should have, but I kept showing up. I think that alone, was my saving grace. If you compare the first and the last pic- that's a 15+ pound difference but my body looks completely different. I carry the weight differently, I have more muscle in the last two pictures. I have to be careful not to define myself by a number. 

Anyway, what happened. It's simple. I quit doing the things food wise that helped me reach that goal. I think I celebrated turning 40 for almost 6 months. It adds up over time. That one bite, that one off meal that turns into two off meals, which in turn ends up being the whole week. The thought of "I worked hard for this, I deserve it". "One bite won't hurt". If you truly only do it once in awhile, no, it will not affect you. I however, went back to some really old habits and it kicked my behind. Plain and simple. 

Here's what I learned in this process:

Weight gain happens. Accept it. Learn from it, fix it. 

My life revolves around food. I got a promotion? Let's go eat!  It's your birthday? Let's go eat!  Hockey game?  Let's go eat!  See the pattern?  We live in a society that revolves around food. Watch your TV.  Think about your own life. How important is food outside of just fueling your body to survive?

I always hear the phrase "It's a lifestyle change". It's not let's lose the weight and then go back to living the way you were before. I promise you, it will ALL come back. See? I just saved you a lot of heartache. However, you might be like me and have to learn the hard way.   There may be some of you reading this who do not suffer from the same emotional attachment to food like myself and others do.  It may be really hard for you to understand why it's such a struggle. My boyfriend is like that. He could care less about food. He likes food but it's not a big deal to him. I often times wish I could be like that. And I can, it just requires more mental discipline and changing things in my life. 

So, my next few posts will be talking about how to do just that. How to live in the real world and not give in to every single food temptation that's there. You can do it, we can do it. We just have to be willing to do the work. Thanks for listening and being so supportive!  

Just be awesome!

~Vanessa

Motivation: What Drives You?

Why do you want to do this?

That was the hardest question Roger (my mentor/food guy) asked me. He said I really needed to figure this out. I needed to have some sort of a purpose. 

Now, those of you who know me personally, know I am goal-driven in my life. When I say I am going to do _________, for the most part, it happens. Simply because if it is something I want to accomplish, I work to make it happen. 

Let me give you an example. I have known since I was a kid what I wanted to do as a career. I can remember my mom and I having a conversation about school and she said that I would first graduate high school, then go on to college. She explained that you get your Bachelor's degree, then your Master's and then finally your Doctoral degree. My family put a strong emphasis on education. They didn't push me into any career, they just wanted us (my siblings and I) to be successful. From a young age I wanted to be a teacher. I had it in my head that I would do all of those things. It never once occurred to me that I couldn't. No one ever said I wasn't capable. They will also tell you I'm pretty hard headed and pretty determined. I'm sure that played a role along the way. 

So, fast forward to today. I finished my Bachelor's degree in 1996 (while getting married, having 2 kids and then getting divorced). I began teaching in 1998 (after substituting and working as a paraprofessional and and an Instructional assistant, and getting remarried during that time too). I taught for 10 years (had a third child), finished my Master's degree and then left teaching in 2008 to complete my PhD. I wanted to teach at the University level. After four years of graduate work (two more jobs and getting divorced) I wrote my dissertation and graduated in December 2012. 

My point in sharing that quick synopsis of my life was that I had a goal and despite whatever job I had, personal struggles I was going through or what life handed to me, I did what I set out to do and reached my goal. Again, It never occurred to me that I couldn't. Write a paper?  Sure. I can do that. Research and make it over 100+ pages?  No problem. I wanted a University job, and I went to numerous interviews, made connections and landed full time where I am today, two years later. 

So. What does that have to do with fitness?  Well, I needed a new goal. A new challenge. I wasn't happy with how I had let myself go. My health wasn't the best. So I figured I would work on me. Remember, I set goals and work to make it happen. Well, this girl met her match. This was completely new to me. It required an entirely different skill set. I didn't (and sometimes don't) have the confidence. Write a huge paper?  Sure. Speak in front of hundreds of people?  No problem. Lose 30+ pounds and keep it off?  Um, I don't know. Not sure if I can do it. I don't know how. 

This has been by far the hardest thing I have ever done. And that my friends, sends me for a loop. I don't have the experience or education to back me up this time. Going back through my health history, I have been told there are things that I can't do. In this area of my life I am no longer the expert. I'm the new kid. I'm not the teacher and I really suck being the student.  (Sorry, I'm sure there's a better way to put that, lol). And, I have stumbled a lot. 

But here's the cool part: I have an amazing support system that I have put together to help me reach my goal. Not once has Roger ever told me I couldn't do this. (I was pretty sure at some point he would tell me to give it up. He hasn't. ) My trainers, my gym friends, and the ladies I have developed supportive relationships keep cheering me on, encouraging me to get back up and try again and sharing with me how they did it. If I didn't have that in my life right now, I would have quit ages ago. 

So, what motivates me now?  You do. People who join me along the way in the journey and say, hey! I get it. You're human. I struggle too. WE CAN DO THIS. That is what keeps me motivated. 

So think about your goals. Mine was to get skinny. It's not about that anymore. It's about getting fit, feeling healthy and being around for my family for many years to come. 

Thank you for coming along on this journey with me. You help me more than you realize. 

Be awesome today!!

My BIGGEST Struggle

One word: FOOD

Not just any food, SUGAR. Desserts, soda, candy, whatever.

I have a ridiculous love affair with SUGAR and I am struggling to drop it. I know- it's JUST FOOD. It's not real food (no nutritional value) and wreaks havoc on my system. But old habits and emotional eating make this the hardest thing for me to quit EVER. There. I said it. That is my weak spot.

I find when things are good, I can stay away. The stress and frustration that life brings seems to bring the want/craving back. I can be an emotional eater and I find myself just going straight to it without even thinking- "is this getting me to my goal??" Of course, the answer is no. Do I feel better? For a minute. Then guilt, remorse and all that goes with it sets in.

I am in no way perfect. (yep, admitted that IN PRINT!) but I am finding a few things that do help: I try not to keep tempting stuff in the house. No, I do not make the rest of my family eat like I do. I encourage it, but I don't make them. So, if I have to have that around, I get stuff I don't like. I also try to plan ahead and make sure I eat as I am supposed to. If I miss a snack or eat later than usual, it messes me up. I have also just tried being honest with myself and talk to some close friends who know what it's like. I even message my nutritionist and tell him that I REALLY want to drink a soda, or eat some bad foods. Sometimes just acknowledging it takes the power of the food and the urge away. I am striving for progress here. Most times I am successful, some days, not so much.

The other thing I learned through trial and error, is that if I screw up- the whole day IS NOT LOST. I used to think, well, I screwed that up - forget the rest of the day. It's on! Not the case. I just need to clean it up and stay on track the rest of the day. I read somewhere that if you get a flat on one tire, you don't slash the rest of them. As silly as that may sound, it made logical sense to me. Just because I mess up once, don't trash the entire day.

That is where I am today. Just trying to stay on track. Are you aware of what your triggers are? What do you do to avoid giving in to temptation?

Just be awesome!

Take the Challenge!

A Little Bit About Me...Part 2

So, after the whole pacemaker ordeal and adjusting to that- life returned back to normal.

At about 17, I started experiencing new symptoms. I was tired and wanted to sleep a lot. My left hand had two knuckles that began to swell a lot. Again, I had the doctors stumped. Tests were ran,we checked for lupus, tick bites, you name it. At the time, I was too old to be diagnosed with Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis and too young for adult rheumatoid arthritis, but in the end the doctor's agreed that, indeed, that was the diagnosis. There were not many options to treat this disease back in 1990. Gold shots were an option, but everything was heavy duty and they were not sure of the side effects, especially if I wanted to have children later in life. The best bet at that point was to try and keep the symptoms down and go from there. Over the years my medications have varied. Some have been recalled and pulled from the market due to side effects. At one point I was taking over 10 pills a day. I am not a very good patient- I really hate being compliant. (I'm a little hard headed that way!) I have endured several surgeries and probably need a few more, just trying to hold off as long as I can. Rheumatoid arthritis is a debilitating disease, but believe it or not, the more active you are, the better off you are. Seems like the opposite would be true, but I finally got tired of the disease controlling me. In 2001, I was on a waiting list for a new medication, Enbrel- a shot that you take once a week and it shuts down your immune system so the disease will not attack my body. It has been a big help and provided a lot of relief, but I have been able to manage my symptoms a lot within the last year and a half, by regulating and monitoring my foods. I will address that in a later blog- but due to dietary changes, I went from one shot a week to one shot every few months. It's been pretty amazing.

The other issue (as if those two were not enough!!!) would be talking about my eating disorder that I battled in college. If you remember from my earlier blog, I mentioned that I was always pretty thin, until I hit my late teens. Then the weight started to pile on- maybe from medication, the rheumatoid, whichever. I didn't handle that very well and I really didn't know how to deal with it appropriately. I exercised a lot but didn't realize that my nutrition wasn't on par. This led to many binges and developed bulimia while I was away at school. I tried to keep it hidden, my roommate and suite mates were aware, but we didn't have a lot of education on disorders and it just wasn't talked about. In the end, it became so bad that I had to be hospitalized over it and that's when it really frightened me. I worked hard to try avoid those behaviors and it isn't something I deal with on a regular basis anymore.

There's a lot more that goes into dealing with all my health issues- combined, it can be a lot to handle some days. When it's good- it's really good. When it's bad, I won't lie, it sucks. However, I have found new information about foods, exercise and my nutrition that helps me create new habits to replace bad habits. As a result, my health has improved. Is it perfect? Nope. But anything is better than how I felt a few short years ago. You have a chance to take control of your life, your health and your future. You can do it!

A Little Bit About Me: Part 1

To help you understand my journey and struggles a bit, you need to know a little about my background.

Growing up I was pretty thin. I was one of THOSE people who could eat whatever and you could never tell. I had no idea that the habits I was forming when I was younger, was going to make things so much harder later in life. We grew up in a time when carbs were "good" and soda really wasn't bad, or so we thought. Grandma grew up in the south and I enjoyed some amazing cooking and meals and learned to cook them for my family as well. I didn't experience any changes in weight until I was about 18-19 and I didn't know what to do about it. But, before we talk about that, there are a few health issues we have to address first.


I led a pretty active lifestyle- we played outside all the time, rode bikes and I participated in extra curricular activities in school (cheerleading and running). When I was a freshman in high school- we were at an away track meet and that particular day, I wasn't running. At lunch we walked to the local Hardee's and I was in line to order when I first passed out. Laid out flat on the tile and hit my head pretty hard. It was pretty embarrassing, and since there we didn't have cell phones or anything, we couldn't call home. They checked me out, I felt ok (except my head hurting where I hit it) and we told my parents when I went home.


Over the next couple of months, it happened several more times. In class, wherever. My family doctor couldn't figure it out. I was a relatively healthy girl and there wasn't any reasonable explanation for this to happen. I can remember he told my parents I must not be eating. (Um, have you seen me eat??) They watched me to be sure I was eating. Then they told them maybe I was on drugs. (What?) Then he told my parents I must be faking it for attention. It was a really frustrating time for everyone. My parents decided that I would need to travel to St. Louis and go to Cardinal Glennon and be evaluated there. Maybe they would have some answers.


I went in early May for a week of tests to try and figure it out. As each test was performed and each one came back normal, we were all getting frustrated. On the 5th or 6th day, they put a Holter monitor on me to check my heart. I had already done stress tests, ekg, echocardiograms, so they thought this might help a bit. I when down to have another test done and I passed out there. We marked the event on the monitor and continued on with the tests and I went back to the room. What happened after they took the monitor off me, changed everything. When they examined the monitor and printed out the tape, they noticed that when I passed out, my heart had stopped. Flatlined for 13 seconds. Then restarted and continued as normal. The next thing I knew, doctors were meeting with my parents and they were scheduling emergency surgery to implant a pacemaker for my heart. I was hooked up to a heart monitor and limited to what I could do. It was definitely the scariest thing I have ever experienced.


On Mother's Day, 1988; I had my first pacemaker implanted. At that time it was a major surgery and required a minimum of a week's stay. When I was in recovery I remember coming out of anesthesia and seeing a man in black at the side of my bed. I panicked and yelled at him, as I was scared and thought I had died. Turns out it was a priest who had heard of my condition, and was coming to pray for me and make sure I was doing ok. I apologized to the poor man later, and he completely understood. After being discharged, everyone was very cautious with me. No more contact sports (I kept score a lot in PE). Very few young people my age had ever had one-so it was new for everybody. This was the first of major health issues I would have to encounter.

I Did It!

Well, it's taken me long enough. I have had this sitting on my computer since mid-last year when it was strongly suggested that I start a blog and talk about my story. I'll be honest. I didn't want to do it. When things are good, it's easy to talk about it and share. When it gets tough- that's when things get hard. Who wants to say they are struggling? Who wants to say they are going backwards? I used to think no one wants to, but I found out that when I finally opened up to my friends, we were all going through the same thing. We ALL struggle.

My friend Debbie said on her radio show today, it's a journey, not a destination. She is 100% right. You will never "arrive", it will be something you always work towards and your goal is to be better today than you were yesterday. Not better than anyone else, just be a better you. So, here it goes. I will share about my successes and you'll hear about my struggles. I will also introduce some of my "Fit Friends" each week- people like you and I who are just wanting to live a healthier lifestyle. I'll also share some of the pages I follow on FB, as well as blogs I like to read too.

I look forward to hearing from you and sharing my journey along the way! Have a great week! Vanessa